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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26248060">You’ve Got to be Kidding Me</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/supercorncob/pseuds/supercorncob'>supercorncob</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Parallel of Us [7]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Assassination Classroom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>M/M, lol i dunno it’s my first time doing this here</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 02:35:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,577</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26248060</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/supercorncob/pseuds/supercorncob</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Whatever you write on your skin shows up on your soulmate’s skin after the first time you touch. </p><p>Karma Akabane is a new student at Kunugigaoka High School, and based on his grades, he’s a big threat to Gakushu Asano. Asano didn’t know much about this new kid on the papers, but Akabane knew enough; having gone to Kunugigaoka Junior High for a year before moving across the country for the rest of junior high. Though that’s not all. </p><p>What happens after the two get into a fist fight?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Akabane Karma/Asano Gakushuu</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Parallel of Us [7]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2191350</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>81</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter One: First Period</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>So I twisted the AU a bit, but yes ok like I’ve read too many Karushuu fics in the past three nights not to post one of my own.</p><p>Also I’m sorry if there are any mistakes :) I hate proofreading and i’m not sure many people will read this anyways</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was the first day of school, of high school no less. Asano was ready for another year of hard work, and long lessons. This year was going to be the same as the last, and the one before, not that he was upset about keeping the top spot for over ten years, it’s just that it got boring after a while. Not even his friends could keep up with him academically, and no one from any one of his classes either. The only challenge for Asano was his father, though he barely counted. As far as he knew, this year would be the most boring yet. </p><p>The strawberry blond washed and freshened up before putting his new school uniform on. He looked exactly the same. It was ironic really, the only thing that changed was the fact that his uniform now said ‘High School,’ instead of ‘Junior High.’ </p><p>As he walked down the stairs and into the dining room for breakfast with his father, he thought about the things that might change, ever so slightly. For starters, people seemed to be more into the notion of love at his age, fussing about their soulmates and whatnot. He made a mental note to steer clear of that kind of gossip. Secondly, new students from all around the country had been accepted into the school, so there were  new faces he needed to remember. Then lastly, he was one of the youngest students in the school again, right after being of of the oldest in junior high, being in third year. </p><p>“All set then?” The voice from across the table snapped Gakushu out of his thoughts. A year ago his father would never have asked him anything nearly that personal. </p><p>“Yes of course,” he responded after a second or two of hesitation. He then reached for a fork for his pancakes. Their Americanized breakfast was also a change. Who knew Principle Asano had a thing for foreign cuisine?</p><p>“Do you need a ride?” He really was serious about the ‘growing as a father’ business. </p><p>“If you don’t mind,” he replied politely, grateful that he even asked. </p><p>“Of course not, but this means we’re leaving in ten,” the older of the two explained as he excused himself for the table to gather up some more papers he had left in his study, leaving Gakushu alone with his thoughts. </p><p>That morning was one of the first times Gakushu ever showed any interest in the whole soulmate situation. He remembered thinking about it, and after that he couldn’t stop. The part of him groaning about nothing changing over the years was masking the part of him that was eternally grateful that nothing had to change and pull him out of his comfort zone. Hopefully none of the soulmate business would interfere with his studies, and hopefully his wouldn’t meet him this year. He couldn’t be distracted with love and affection, he had a reputation to withhold. </p><p>The Asanos got to school in their car and went their separate ways without a word once they stepped foot into the parking lot, not that Gakushu was expecting anything more. So the younger of the pair went off into the courtyard to meet with his group. </p><p>“Asano-kun,” Ren smiled at the child prodigy he’d learnt to call his friend.<br/>
“Hey,” he nodded his head, acknowledging the others. Then they subconsciously got into formation and walked into the tall building. People were staring, but they were used to it; kids their age and even the upset class men. Asano’s reputation was well known throughout the entire campus.</p><p> </p><p>Everyone in the school would move away and make room for the five of them, so Asano allowed himself to walk calmly, he walked confidently actually, knowing that everyone knew their place. He had to admit that in times like these he was a bit like his father, although apparently he wasn’t enough like his father to sense the one boy who didn’t move aside. He bumped right into him. </p><p>“Look where you’re going next time,” a sly voice came out of the boy right in front of Asano, “I wouldn’t want to trip you,” there was something threatening about his voice, it was edging him on. </p><p>“You should’ve moved,” he retorted, impatiently as the other boy still hadn’t moved. </p><p>“You should’ve moved, but here we are,” he smirked, staring Asano down. The younger of the two felt a chill go down his spine as the amber eyes stared him down; he hated the feeling. He stared back  just as intensely. The tension between the two could be cut with a knife, and the silence in the hallway made it feel like everyone was holding their breaths. </p><p>Everyone was waiting for something to happen, but Asano wouldn’t give this new kid the satisfaction of starting anything, so after a moment he walked away, or at least he tried to. </p><p>With a swift movement, Karma managed to slip his foot above Asano’s shin, and the boy came down; though even while he was falling it was done with a certain amount of grace. Karma took a mental note of that, and hoped to crack that facade sooner or later. </p><p>“This could’ve been avoided,” Asano scoffed, getting up as quickly as he went down. This time his gaze was even more intense, and everyone really was holding their breaths.<br/>
“If you had moved,” Karma nodded, “but hey, now you know,” he tilted his head down, and smiled a bit, showing some teeth. </p><p>“That you’re immature, yes,” he frowned, looking unimpressed. He’d perfected that face. </p><p>“You gonna do something about that? Your highness?” Karma leaned back onto the wall, he seemed too relaxed for a boy who had basically challenged a classmate to a fight. </p><p>“I’m going to be mature about it,” he tilted his head upwards, and looked down on his classmate. </p><p>“Your superiority complex is showing,” Akabane teased, standing up again. He was usually taller than everyone, but they were about the same height; no matter though, he would win this game. All he needed to do was to make Asano a player. </p><p>“Your delinquent is showing,” there was a tone of irritation in his voice, “we have class,” it’s true that a few minutes had passed since the two had bumped into each other. </p><p>“Oh,” his tone changed, and he looked down at his watch, “alright then,” he smiled and put on a cheery facade, “til next time then your Majesty.”</p><p>Karma walked away and headed to his first class, leaving Asano staring at the space in the wall he was just leaning on. The silence continued for another minute or so, but once Gakushu began to walk away, the hallways were as loud as ever. </p><p>There was something about the new kid that made Asano mad, a hot kind of mad, the kind of mad that left you warm minutes after the initial encounter. A weird kind of mad, he wasn’t even sure it was qualified as mad. </p><p>It probably wasn’t, because the feeling he got in the hallway wasn’t even close to how he felt when he saw who was sitting in his first period math class, and when he saw that he was sitting in the very front. Then he sighed as he took the seat right next to him. </p><p>“Sitting beside the king himself? What an honour,” Karma smiled innocently at the strawberry blond.<br/>
“I appreciate the view from the front of the class,” he explained a bit too quickly and a bit too loudly.<br/>
“I’m flattered, but this is strictly a work relationship,” Karma teased, knowing that he misinterpreted Gakushu’s words. He was also glad that people were looking.<br/>
“You know what I meant,” Gakushu snapped at the red head, still somehow keeping his poise. It was the day for first impressions.<br/>
“Layman’s terms please.”<br/>
“The view of the board, oh, I didn’t catch your name,” he stared into the other’s eyes, feeling the hatred and tension between them.<br/>
“Akabane,” he replied nonchalantly, returning the glare.<br/>
“Asano,” he said, introducing himself formally just in case he was unfamiliar with the name of the student who would crush him academically.<br/>
“It’s a pleasure to meet you then Asano-kun,” he extended his arm for the other boy to shake.<br/>
“Likewise,” he took his hand, and was pulled forward just slightly. His eyes widened in shock.<br/>
“May the best man win then?” Karma whispered into the blond boy’s ear, taunting him with every word. One Asano recovered from the initial shock, he smirked a bit.<br/>
“I will,” and they broke apart. </p><p>They went through rollcall and started with the course material. Everyone got a package, except Asano who received two. This had Karma raising his hand in the first ten minutes of class. </p><p>“Akabane? Is there a problem?” Gakushu was sure Karma was asking for help or something. Maybe this wouldn’t be as much of a challenge as he had hoped.<br/>
“Actually, yes,” he glanced at Asano for a brief moment and smiled politely at the teacher, “I only got one package,” Gakushu had to refrain from laughing. His competitiveness was going to get him killed.<br/>
“Everyone got one package,” the teacher explained, looking unimpressed at the new student.<br/>
“Everyone?” He asked, this time purposely looking at Asano.<br/>
“Ah, yes, mister Asano has proved to be too, hm, advanced for just one workbook. I only give out as many packages as I think a student can finish within the period,” she explained; she was challenging him.<br/>
“Ah, I see,” he pretended to back down, and this whole exchange got Gakushu in a pretty good mood. He began to work, taking more than a few glances at Akabane. He seemed slow. Akabane worked with his head rested back and with a lazy grip on his pencil. He was somewhat relieved but also disappointed.</p><p>Gakushu continued to work in silence, and just as he finished the last question of the first math booklet, he heard a newly familiar voice clear his throat. </p><p>“Yes mister Akabane? Do you need help?” The teacher asked, looking unimpressed. He expected Karma to be humbled by this and would be glad to teach him a lesson, but the look on his face told her that that was not the reason who he had gotten her attention.<br/>
“Yes miss,” he started off, his voice coated with the right amount of arrogance and sarcasm to make Asano flinch. Karma stood up, “if we’re done the work are we allowed to leave?” It was only a short twenty minutes into the class.<br/>
“Excuse me?”<br/>
“Well you know, I figured it would be better to leave. I have nothing else to do here,” Karma hummed almost, walking up to the front desk to place his workbook down.<br/>
“I see. Just so you know mister Akabane, I will be grading these. But for now please stay in class where you’re needed,” she gestured towards a copy of the package she had given Asano at the beginning, “this should keep you busy.” Gakushu wasn’t laughing anymore, especially not when he realized that he had fallen behind by watching their short interaction, so without further ado he got straight to work. Karma did the same thing a few moments later while the teacher corrected his work.<br/>
“Asano-kun,” Karma whispered to his seatmate, “were you supposed to hand that in?” He meant the first booklet that was neatly placed at the top right corner of Asano’s desk. He had forgotten, “I could do it for you,” he offered.<br/>
“Thank you,” he said after letting the wave of anger pass, “I’ll do it myself,” with that he went up front, “apologies miss, I was distracted by the second booklet.” Karma smirked.<br/>
“No problem Asano, get back to work,” she smiled courteously and opened his book to grade as well.<br/>
“You’re welcome,” Karma hummed, flipping his page again.<br/>
The two of them raced to finish first, and when they did they stood up and ran up to the front, nearly knocking another student who had just finished her first booklet down.<br/>
“We’re sorry miss, just excited for the class is all,” Asano tried to play it off cool.<br/>
“Oh yes, very. I’m terribly sorry for Asano-kun’s behaviour. He gets a little worked up,” Karma flashed a smile at the teacher as he dropped his booklet onto her desk. They both sat back down, one with a satisfied smirk on his face and the other with a grimace. </p><p>Then after a bit, the first period was finally over.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter Two</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Karma witnesses a series of Gakushuu-esque events.</p><p>Wrote this in November but voila ???</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'll make a longer third chapter, but yes I was looking through my docs and decided I'd post this (shorter) part :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Yeah, I know I know,” Karma laughed into his phone. It was lunch time and he was having a talk with his oldest friend. </p><p>“Yeah but seriously, he’s the principal's son,”  He stated, wary of his friend’s mischievous ways. </p><p>“Is that supposed to matter? He’s a student,” he explained. </p><p>“Hm,” he thought, and while it was true; Karma had a point, he could be treading in dangerous waters. Unlike Karma, Nagisa had stayed at Kunugigaoka for all of junior high, so he knew what kind of man principal Asano was. </p><p>“So, how’s the whole soulmate thing going for you?” Karma changed the topic, knowing that nothing Nagisa could say would change his mind about Asano just being another <em> normal </em>student. </p><p>“Oh,” the taller of the two could almost see the look on Nagisa’s face by listening to the small sounds of embarrassment he made before answering, “I got something,” he said awkwardly.</p><p>“Well? You gonna tell me? Or was it embarrassing,” he smirked.</p><p>“It said, um, Mountain Menace,” he explained, knowing that any minute now, Karma would be laughing at him. </p><p>“Mountain? Menace?” There it was, Akabane’s ridiculing laugh, “looks like you’ve got a fanfiction writer Nagisa,” he said as he finished his fit of laughter, “was that all? Where do you think you came into contact with them?” He asked as he finally looked down at his food. He had some fried rice, samon, and soy sauce. </p><p>“I went to an arcade yesterday, and then to a cafe with Sugino,” he tried to recall, “maybe I walked past them there?”</p><p>“Write something back,” he said as he began to eat; the food was good, since he made it himself. </p><p>“What? No no no, I have a notepad to write on,” he shook his head, and Karma chuckled. If Karma was in his situation, he’d write a whole lot on his hand. He’d write whatever he deemed embarrassing enough actually. </p><p>“Your loss,” he took another bite, “hey there’s a crowd forming,” he explained after swallowing some water, “I’m gonna check it out.”</p><p>“Alright, see you,” Nagisa smiled into the phone until the call was over. He had failed to mention the rest of the things on his hand.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Shooting at 5 </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Guns and props </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Dinner with parents at 7 </em>
</p><p> </p><p>What on earth did that mean?</p><p> </p><p>Meanwhile Karma made his way through the cafeteria towards all the fuss after packing up his homemade meal. He pushed past a few people and finally got to the front. What he saw took him by surprise. </p><p> </p><p>“He pushed me!” An unfamiliar voice shouted and Karma couldn’t care less about who had pushed the boy, he was only really shocked at who he was telling. </p><p>“I see. He pushed you, you say?” His face had an unreadable expression on it and he continued to speak after the person he was engaging in conversation with nodded his head, “so you took his glasses, his phone,” he listed the things almost lazily, “his uniform blazer,” he paused for a moment, looking into the crowd with a small smile forming on his lips, “and attempted to take his arm,” his sarcasm was almost enough to make Karma laugh at the situation.</p><p>“When you say it like that I mean he,” the taller male with the blue hair and clearly angry eyes was cut off.</p><p>“Yes he pushed you, I know. Though honestly,” he let himself smile, “you should’ve finished the job,” he looked too calm for what he was saying and this intrigued Karma. </p><p>“What do you-”</p><p>“Take an arm? Why stop there? Obviously a push is an offence that can’t be looked over. It’s an offence only punishable by death,” he stated, and everyone was hooked on every word, and while Karma scoffed at them for being that way, he was the same. </p><p>“That’s not what I meant,” the older boy huffed, humiliated.</p><p>“What else could you have meant? At Kunugigaoka we never do anything,” he paused to think, “to put it simply, half assed. So unless you intend to kill Rin, I suggest you turn it around completely and bring him to the nurse. The rest of us have lunch,” he concluded his scolding. A scolding like that would’ve made his father proud. </p><p> </p><p>When the taller boy sighed in defeat, the strawberry blond made his way out of the crowd. Soon enough the crowd that had formed simply to watch him had disbursed. Asano left the cafeteria and went off to the office. He received a text message three minutes into lunch from his father to meet with him before his afternoon classes. </p><p> </p><p>“Take a seat,” Gakuhou gestured at the seat in front of his large wooden desk.</p><p>“What is it now?” They had promised to try to drop the cold and overly professional aura about their conversations, so Asano tried to do just that, which caused his father to sigh. </p><p>“Yes, right. How was your first day?” So small talk was on the table.</p><p>“It was alright, save for my encounters with Akabane,” </p><p>“Oh yes,” he nodded, “he might give you a run for your money,” the silence after what was meant to be a joke was deafening, “but he won’t,” Gakuhou assured himself more than anyone. </p><p>“I’ll make sure of that, yes. Was that all?” </p><p>“Almost, you have a soccer tournament overseas in a week. I thought I’d be the first to inform you.”</p><p>“Will you be accompanying me?” He asked, his expression indifferent.</p><p>“Do you need me to?” Then there was a silence in the room. </p><p>“No,” Gakushu sighed, “I’ll be on my way then. Wouldn’t want to be late.”</p><p>“Of course, I’ll be home late tonight,” he added before wordlessly dismissing him and going back to his work. Though Gakushu had to wonder what type of work he had on the first day.</p><p> </p><p>“Asano-kun,” an irritating voice followed the blond boy through the halls after he had left his father’s office. </p><p>“Yes Akabane?” He didn’t bother looking back to face him.</p><p>“What was that about? In the cafeteria?” He asked.</p><p>“I’m the student council president and they were wreaking havoc,” he explained, finally stopping to look the other boy in the eye, realizing that the way he was heading to avoid the conversation wasn’t leading him anywhere near his next class. </p><p>“High and mighty of you,” and even when he was giving compliments, there was an edge to Karma’s voice that made Gakushu’s blood boil. Karma was more than satisfied with that wordless response, so he walked off, content with himself. Maybe he’d go out of his way more to bother the strawberry blond.</p><p> </p><p>(Idk what I’m doing)</p><p> </p><p> His next class was English, one that he didn’t have with Asano. It was a shame though, he was sure his English skills were better than Asano’s. He didn’t spend the majority of his summers overseas for nothing. He sat there, listening to the course outline, grammar, books, plays, everything he didn’t have time for. When was class over again? </p><p> </p><p>Halfway through class he asked to be excused and found himself walking into the boy’s bathroom, he decided he was going to wash his hands, his face too. It was a while before he heard another person shuffling in one of the stalls. A smile crept on to his face, maybe he could prank this person? He obviously wouldn’t mind, pranking was normal right? Karma dug into his pockets to try to find something to scare the poor boy with. He decided to go with spiders, fake ones of course, he tossed them into the stall where he had heard the sounds and after hearing a satisfying yelp, the sound of something plunging into water rang through the tiled room. </p><p> </p><p>Karma froze, wanting to run for it.</p><p> </p><p>“Shit,” a familiar voice groaned, then it sounded like he was taking the phone out of the toilet, “hello? Can you still? No I was quiet because I was getting my paperwork- hello?” The boys groaned again, throwing the phone out of the stall in anger, “no phone calls, fuck,” there were more shuffling sounds and Karma could hear typing. </p><p> </p><p>Ah, so Gakushuu wasn’t taking a shit. Karma decided to lean back against the wall and do some good old fashioned eavesdropping. </p><p> </p><p>“Asano?” The phone croaked, but the water damage was done, “hello? Gakushuu?” The strawberry blond rolled his eyes in the stall and continued to type furiously.</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t get paid enough for this,” he sighed and packed everything up, still blissfully unaware of Karma’s presence. Karma also forgot he was watching for a second, and had to leave quickly. He was halfway through the door when Gakushuu spotted him. Luckily he was leaving backwards.</p><p> </p><p>Karma pretended to walk into the bathroom for the first time, and Gakushuu barely looked his way. Phew. At least one good thing came out of that day, he knew a bit more about his newest enemy.</p>
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